Philosophical and Literary Miscellany

10

...I, most eager to learn, long for you next.
For why is it not worthy to tell you the truth?

Carion O you who have often eaten the same dish of thyme as your master,
friends and fellow-citizens and lovers of hard work,
hurry! Make haste, for the moment allows no delay;
it is at the very peak original: "akmēs" where you must be present to help.
Chorus Don't you see that we have been rushing eagerly for a long time,
as is expected of men who are already a council of concern?
But you are likely to be the sort who, perhaps before we even said this,
knows why the master has called us here.
Carion Indeed, I’ve been telling you for a long time, but you yourself do not listen!
For the master says that all of you shall live happily,
delivered from a cold and difficult life.
Chorus But what is it? And from where does this thing he speaks of come?
Carion He has arrived here bringing a certain old man, O you rogues,
who is filthy, bent, miserable, wrinkled, bald, and toothless.
And by Zeus, I think he is even the Greek "psōlon" implies a crude anatomical joke regarding being circumcised or indecently exposed stripped bare.
Chorus O what a golden word you’ve announced! How do you say it? Tell me again!
For you are revealing that he has come with a whole heap of riches.
Carion Rather, he has come with a heap of geriatric miseries.
Chorus Do you really think you can trick us and get away
unpunished? Especially while I am holding this walking stick?
Carion Do you think my nature is entirely like that,
that I would say everything just to be a burden? what? does he say?
Chorus How solemn the rogue is! Your shins are crying out,
"Ouch, ouch!"—longing for the stocks and the shackles! A mockery of Carion's slave status, suggesting he is overdue for a beating or imprisonment.

Carion Your lot has now been drawn to judge in the tomb! A joke playing on the Athenian jury system; instead of being assigned to a courtroom, Carion says they are assigned to their graves.
Why don't you walk? Charon is already giving you the token. Charon was the ferryman of the dead; the "token" refers to the juror's pass used in Athens, here used to mean a ticket to the underworld.
Chorus You are a born rascal, a real "mothon" a vulgar, low-class dance or person and naturally a headstrong one,
who tells us lies after bringing us here,
for which reason the master called us here.
We, who have toiled much when there was no leisure,
running here eagerly, passing through many roots of thyme.
Carion Well, I will hide it no longer! For, men, my master
has come bringing Wealth, who will make us all rich.
Chorus Is it truly possible for us to become rich?
Carion By the gods, you will be Midases—if you only get the ears of an ass! Midas A reference to King Midas, who was granted the "golden touch" but was also cursed with ass's ears by Apollo.
Chorus How I am pleased and delighted and wish to dance
for joy, if what you say is truly the truth!
Carion Indeed, I shall wish to lead you, mimicking the Cyclops
with a "threttanelo" a nonsense sound imitating a stringed instrument and swaying my feet like this—
and lead you along. But, O children, shout out—
bleating the songs of sheep and smelly goats.
Follow along, you rascals; and you goats, get your breakfast!
Chorus And we, in turn, will seek you, mimicking the Cyclops,
bleating as we catch you in your filth,
holding your bag and wild, dewy herbs,
leading your little sheep—and while you're asleep,
we'll take a sharpened, burning stake and try to blind you! The Chorus parodies the scene from the Odyssey where Odysseus blinds the Cyclops Polyphemus.
Carion And I will mimic Circe the one who mixes the drugs,
who once in Corinth persuaded the companions of Philonides
to eat kneaded dung as if they were boars. Philonides was a contemporary figure mocked by Aristophanes; Circe is the sorceress from the Odyssey who turned men into pigs.
She herself kneaded it for them—
I will mimic all her ways!